Monday, January 18, 2010

Even yet, He still bothers.

In the multitude of words, sin is not lacking.

This is definitely true, for I speak from experience. Why? For I learnt that sometimes, the best thing to do is to shut up. You may very well destroy a person with the words that you speak at the next instant.

Upon reviewing the past events in life, all I can conclude is that God is truly merciful. I mean, after all I have done and am still doing, I still am healthy (and not flattened by a lorry or car), have food, a family and a home, and a brain. Not to mention many blessings. Which really brings me to agree to what Sis Fang Yu said to me during theolo: God loves us to the point that He spoils us sometimes, just like a father.

Of course, He will not hesitate to correct when we go off, and if He does not correct at that moment, bear in mind that its only because He is merciful and is giving us a chance.

The path is not easy. No one said it would be easy. But we must all learn to press on, for if we truly believe and have faith, then God shall be with us all the way.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Gift of 2010

Hey, its the year 2010. New year, new classroom (ironically STILL on the 2nd floor), new set of teachers, SAME homework, SAME amount of trash, MORE dumb stuff and chaos on the way.

Now, while we enter the new year, we all know that we should all "put the past behind" and "get on with the new year" and "start afresh". I'm quite sure we all have heard these cliche phrases repeated over and over and over and over again to us year after year after year after year.....

So, ignoring these dumb repetitions and the fact that people are actually bothering to waste their time to properly pronounce "2010", let us see what the so-called "new" year has to offer...

So, by year I am 16 years old. A real "sweet 16" I must say. I'm now a Sec 4, an age and status that I actually don't want to have. I'm sure by this time, the whole of Singapore must have heard of the crazy O level scores form our school. An achievement, yes, but it means double pressure for us. We would be expected to do better than the previous batch, so lets all hope that we (especially me)will work hard and not give the entire faculty cardiac arrest the same time next year.

For now my studies are fine (or at least I hope so), I hope all my Sec 3 concepts didnt go down the toilet. But I'm a human, I will forget things and make mistakes. So I NEED TO BUCK UP. No more slacking allowed, I must do my best to finish my work, and revise whenever. I'm exhausted yes, but I just have to do AT LEAST something. For crying out loud its only the second week of school and I'm already freaking out, O levels are not long away and I have to deal with Chinese, Amaths and Emaths. (Im currently trying to keep myself from cursing)

And yes by now you should have more or less deduced that my mind is under rather unusual duress.

So gift number 1 of 2010: A deranged and stressed mind

2010: 1 , Rachel : 0

What else you got for me 2010? Oh lemme guess, MORE school related stuff.

Gift number 2: An entire schedule of cramming for Os

2010 : 2 , Rachel : still 0

Please no more..., what you got more? Great.

Gift number 3: No time, exhaustion and fury all bundled nicely with giftwrap and a bow on top.

2010 : 3 , Rachel : STILL 0

Gift number 4: A progressively worsening life thereafter

2010 (and beyond) : 1000000 , Rachel : [Terminated]

So... I guess this new year really has lived up to its name, giving me 4 new gifts that pretty much is also given to everyone else.

May God see me through this stressful year. Long or short, its going to be a very hellish thing for me. I pray that He will hear my cries, even when I'm buried deep under or just one step short of an explosion. For if He does not hear me now, I will surely die. I pray that whenever I feel like saying "Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?" that He will be merciful enough to reply that He will help me.